Ninja Knight Brothers of Blood (1988) User Reviews

It's all very nonsensical, but that's not to say bad.

[tarbosh22000 · 5/10 · 6 December 2013]

In fairly typical Godfrey Ho fashion, with Ninja Brothers of Blood, Ho takes two unrelated plot lines, keeps them running on parallel tracks, and keeps them both unrelated. In plot #1, a man named Charlie Fong, who's "not ambitious, he just wants to get ahead!", and who is known for his "good looks and charm", ends up working at a desk job at one of those big factories that must be very prevalent in Hong Kong. He strikes up a relationship with pretty factory worker Fonda, and soon the two move in together. But it's not long before these two lovebirds playing house fall victim to typical domestic spats and squabbling. When Fonda becomes pregnant, it only exacerbates the situation, especially since Fong - and let's not forget he's ambitious - sets his sights on the boss' daughter, a glamorous artist named Sophie Tao. Will it all end in tragedy, or can Charlie and Fonda patch things up? In plot #2, businessmen around a table (seemingly a Ho staple) decide to send "ninjas" (or so their headbands claim) out to do their bidding so their company can rise to the top. Or something like that, it's basically indecipherable. But does it matter? Only you can be the judge...

With Ninja Brothers of Blood (or Ninja Knight Brothers of Blood as it is also known), we have some classic Ho silliness. If you've ever yearned to see what it would look like if Godfrey Ho made a domestic drama along the lines of the Molly Ringwald movie For Keeps (1988) or even a Ho take on The Graduate (1967), yearn no more. But because we're dealing with the Ninja Boom - that era in video store history when ninjas ruled - Ho had to splice in some unrelated ninja action. Hence the "subplot", if you even want to call it that. So while there are plenty of scenes of Fonda and Charlie's talky troubles, and you're wondering, "this is Ninja Brothers of Blood?", along comes Mike Abbott and the gang to do some sped-up fights in absurd outfits. The obvious conclusion is: there should have been much more of the Mike Abbott ninja plot, and way less of (or none of) the domestic drama plot.

While the movie has that loud, brash dubbing voiced by people that sound like they're doing bad British accents, as if that might somehow "class up" NBOB, and it does have some entertaining synthesizer music on the soundtrack, AND Fonda does have a cool Snoopy T-shirt, the sad fact is that a good 2/3 of the movie is bereft of any action at all, be it ninja or otherwise. So to that extent, the box art, title and so forth are somewhat misleading. We wanted to see more of the guy with curly blonde hair and stonewashed jeans doing his ninja-based thing. Our theory as to why there isn't more of him is that we feel Ho is simply conserving footage. He's thriftily saving what else he may have of this plot for a rainy day. So it's all very nonsensical, but that's not to say bad. We remain Godfrey Ho fans, and we look forward to seeing more of his stuff. One thing you have to admit (especially based on the ending of this movie, if nothing else) - the guy's not predictable.

As ever with Godfrey Ho, your tolerance for utter nonsense will dictate whether you feel hot or cold towards his work.

The greatest movie never released...

[DB-08-DB · 19 May 2002]

This is nothing short of brilliant. Mike Abbott plays Rex, top drug lord and business partner of another highly dangerous drug baron, Bill (played by Mark Watson). When Rex double crosses Bill during a deal at an airport, Bill vows revenge. Meanwhile, across town, Jack Barlow finds his family and friends being murdered one by one after his younger brother witnesses a raid on a liquor store. Bill offers Jack help, knowing that Rex is behind the carnage. At first Jack refuses, but as the corpses begin to pile up, he strikes a reluctant deal with Bill. Both men vow to bring Rex's empire down, although both for very different reasons...

Joseph Lai's production is a masterpiece of late 80's ninja fodder. The cast are nothing short of dynamic. Mike Abbott, as the charasmatic Rex, steals the show. Mean, tough yet handsome and seductive in his blue boiler suit and conditioned hair, Rex is the ultimate screen villian. This is a complex character, we as the audience know he is the villain of the piece and yet we can't help but cheer for him, such is the skill of Abbott as a performer. Mark Watson, too, portrays a man on the edge of good and evil, struggling to make the right decision. With his Sean Penn looks and his subtle line delivery, he is a perfect anti-hero. Ninja Knight Brothers of Blood also has a better than average screenplay for this sort of thing. When Rex tells his henchman Milo that "I've gotta protect my reputation" you believe him. Some of the scenes between Jack Barlow and his family are truly touching, also. But this is an action film, and on that front it delivers with a series of high concept set pieces. These include: a high-speed car chase with Jack Barlow clinging to a car for life, a punch out in a crowded market, a beach fight and a highly charged finale between Rex and Bill. The choreography is above-par and the voice work is spot on. Available on video in the UK on the Cine Ninja lable (sometimes under the title 'Platoon Warriors') this is rousing, engrossing stuff for the serious action fan. Enjoy.

What do you get when you cross a bad film with an even worse one?

[anxietyresister · 1/10 · 6 June 2010]

Answer: A big ol' pile o crap.

In one plot, a Chinese couple move in together, but the boy secretly wants the daughter of a top business magnate, and when he tries to kill his current partner to get what he wants, she isn't happy.. in a co-joined storyline, a young tousled hair cop has his buddy cruelly shot down and swears revenge, but is forced to quit the police when his corrupt superior takes him 'off the case'. From then on we get random scenes of bad guys being sent to kill our renegade as he defeats them repeatedly. Neither storyline has anything to do with the other, and were obviously combined for reasons of padding. Ho hum.

Neither movie is in English, and the dubbing for both is particularly appalling.. The lead guy in the first one for instance has a very strong Aussie accent, and his lead love interest sounds like a spoilt little girl. It is almost impossible to listen to these grating voices without wanting to throw something at the telly, so best move anything heavy from the room. If you think that's bad though, wait till you see the cheesy action sequences in the next story. Sped up action and awful choreography abound, and the whole farrago is less convincing than a Saturday morning cartoon. If it's the violence that earnt it an 18 certificate, then the censors must be the kind of people who must still be scared by Inspector Gadget at the age of 30.

To complete the circle of ineptitude, both tales have notably stupid endings. Without 'spoiling' anything, the first story ends with a completely OTT scene at a church which so ludicrous it would be unbelievable just about anywhere.. but not here. As for the second, well this is the real kicker. A man has his head stuck in a tree , he's being bashed on the bonce and... THE END flashes on screen. No credits. Fade to black. WWHHAATT?! Oh dear. How sad. Never mind. It's film(s) like this that give B movies a bad name.. 1/10

Funny as Hell.

[mistress_o · 10/10 · 16 April 1999]

This movie is the funniest thing I have ever seen in my life!

Everyone needs to go out and see this film! Incontinuity, bad dubbing, a yellow "Ninja" suit, excessive smoking, and a suicide by stabbing at a wedding. It has all the makings for the best black humour movie of all time. Somehow, I don't think that it was intended as such... nonetheless, EXCELLENT.

A Cornish drug baron in Hong Kong?!?!?!?!

[HaemovoreRex · 7/10 · 9 March 2007]

Yes indeed it's time for yet another IFD cut and splice slice of cinematic lunacy.

And who should star in this but one of my very favourite IFD regulars, Mike Abbott who appears here as Rex, drug lord extraordinaire and Cornish man to boot!

Matters get off to a cracking start with Rex who's dressed as though he's going to an eighties disco meeting up with fellow drug lord Bill who's dressed in one of those grey shiny material eighties suits for a major deal. Rex however gets a bit greedy and decides to pull a fast one on Bill by whipping out a gun on him and having his men shoot Bill's cronies. Bill is predictably slightly miffed by this decidedly un-sportsman like conduct and promptly hightails it out of the immediate vicinity with the drugs money under his arm. Suddenly out of nowhere two brightly clad ninja appear and snatch the case leaving Bill now running for his life empty handed as bullets are landing everywhere around his feet......

We next cut to the other film into which the newer sequences are edited where we find some goons (including one who bears an uncanny resemblance to the late footballer George Best!) holding up a liquor store. The robbery goes fine but as they are driving off (rather leisurely I might add) in their getaway car they can't help but notice that a gormless looking dork who is standing by a fence has gotten a good look at their faces. With this in mind they calmly reverse the car and plug the still completely motionless and seemingly zombified imbecile full of bullet holes! It transpires that the hapless fools name was Michael who is later revealed to have scrawled part of the getaway cars registration number on the ground before expiring.

Meanwhile back to the other story and Rex phones up his boys (the robbers in the other film) to arrange a meeting with Raymond…..who the hell is Raymond you might well ask? Well it turns out that he is the main bad guy from the other film(!) Back to the original film again now (are you keeping up with all this?) and in a somewhat predictable plot development Michaels brother Jack swears an oath of revenge for his brothers murder. Matters subsequently take a further turn for the worse next when in a decidedly unlikely plot contrivance Jacks father is also accidentally killed by the same goons who murdered Michael during a crossfire shootout in the midst of an illegally held fistfight.

In between these family woes Bill is busy in exacting his own revenge against Rex's minions. Rex himself turns out to be still up to his illicit ways and in one scene in an apparent blatant disregard for the law is seen taste testing some drugs by the roadside(!!!) proclaiming the merchandise as and I quote, 'Some good sh*t'.

Meanwhile Raymond gets wind of Jacks exploits and resolves to put a stop to his meddling ways via a drive by shooting at Jack's house. As it turns out, Jack survives the attempt but his mother and sister are killed. Furthermore, Raymond proceeds to kidnap and subsequently rape Jacks other sister (who like her late brother Michael before her stands and watches the carnage of her families slaughter with a not dissimilar vacant expression). This prompts Jack to go to Bill for help who arranges for some weapons to be delivered to Jack in a carrier bag that Jack curiously holds onto tenaciously for the remainder of the film. Predictably the rest of the film involves Jack wiping out all those miscreants responsible for his families deaths. This he achieves by disguising himself in various crappy looking hats so that his victims won't recognise him……an ingenious tactic I'm sure that you'll agree? Rex meanwhile is becoming increasingly peeved with Bill who is wiping out all his lackeys. In one hilarious scene Rex is standing in a public park bemoaning the fact that Jack and Bill are laying waste to his plans when he suddenly proclaims to his henchman that he needs 'to take a p*ss' (no I'm not making this up!) As he is busy performing his bodily functions Bill suddenly appears brandishing a machine gun and opens fire on him. Understandably somewhat shocked by this incivility and the interruption of natures call, Rex runs down the hill with his member still clutched firmly in his hands whilst his poor henchman isn't so lucky and gets plugged full of lead.

Bill next informs Jack as to a deal going down between Raymond and George Best look-alike (remember him from earlier?) The scene is thus set for a final showdown which is against all odds actually handled rather well (honestly!!!) During this gun battle however Jack takes a slug in the gut from Raymond who manages to fire off a few rounds in his death throes. Finally Jack blasts away George Best look-alike before the police turn up (late as ever) and apprehend him.

For the obligatory finale Rex and Bill (both decked out in full military togs) square off atop a hill during which as many expletives as ammo rounds are exchanged. Eventually the two adversaries resolve to settle their differences in hand to hand combat utilising knives. Rex predictably comes out worse but has the final laugh by blowing himself up with a grenade at which point the film abruptly ends.....erm OK.

Yep this is a typically inept and hilarious IFD effort which features the usual quota of unintentionally side splitting scenes as well as a plethora of bad dubbing and voice over work. Best of all is Mike Abbott's broad West Country accent, especially as evidenced whenever he utters an expletive such as 'Arrssssse'.

For fellow fans of bad movies, a must see!