M*A*S*H (TV Series)
Heal Thyself (1980)
Loretta Swit: Maj. Margaret 'Hot Lips' Houlihan
Photos
Quotes
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Maj. Margaret 'Hot Lips' Houlihan : Look, we can do this easy, or we can do this hard.
Colonel Sherman T. Potter : Why can't we just not do it at all?
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Colonel Sherman T. Potter : Margaret, I know you're trying to help me, and God knows there isn't a pillow around that could go the distance with ya, but you'd bring a smile to this swollen face if you'd just leave me alone.
Maj. Margaret 'Hot Lips' Houlihan : Colonel...
Colonel Sherman T. Potter : And don't let the door hit ya on the fanny on the way out.
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Maj. Margaret 'Hot Lips' Houlihan : Anything else I can do for you, sir?
Colonel Sherman T. Potter : One thing. You've been here all day. Leave me alone!
Maj. Margaret 'Hot Lips' Houlihan : You don't have to shout.
Colonel Sherman T. Potter : Yes, I do. I would never hit a woman.
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Maj. Charles Winchester : Colonel, isn't it a bit early in the day to be, um--how shall I put it--bagged?
Colonel Sherman T. Potter : It's not booze that's got me in this shape, Winchester, it's mumps.
Maj. Charles Winchester : [laughs] I--Forgive me, Colonel. It's just that it's a bit silly to find a childhood malady afflicting a man of your advanced years.
Maj. Margaret 'Hot Lips' Houlihan : Step aside, Major.
Maj. Charles Winchester : What's next for you, Colonel? Unsightly teenage blemishes?
Colonel Sherman T. Potter : Ah, between you and the mumps, Winchester, I'd prefer the mumps. At least I know they're going to go away.