JL Ranch (2016) User Reviews

Every time I have hope for a Hallmark film....

[caseybones · 4/10 · 23 August 2016]

...I am always disappointed.

Hallmark used to have such wonderfully acted and written films. Apparently that group of writers has died off because everything they put out now is trivial, dull, and uninteresting with really bad acting.

"The Fish and Wildlife Service will be all over you like stink on a pig" is an example of the sparkling rhetoric you will hear. I"m all for giving work to Actors of a Certain Age (and I am of that age so I can appreciate it) but Voight and Caan show so little of their acting abilities that it's embarrassing.

And I can see taking certain liberties with continuity but this is a hot mess. And the characters are just caricatures with each one taking on the role of good guy, bad guy (villain wears a black hat, for Pete's sake), put-upon daughter, big-hearted sheriff, frisky granddaughter, ad nauseam.

Don't waste your time. Lots of better things to do!

Entertaining but leaves you hangning

[jmarsh-24922 · 6/10 · 28 September 2020]

Voight and Caan turn in convincing performances but the movie plays like a pilot for a series. Its let down a bit by details such as California plated vehicles on a "Texas" ranch which is actually in Kentucky. Its entertaining but leaves you hanging a bit since they don't actually wrap things up. I know some political wackos will have their heads explode making a rancher the hero but the story is really a family feud storyline.

OK Story

[toncincin · 6/10 · 29 September 2020]

But why is no talent Melanie Griffith in it? How does this woman have an acting career. She talks like a little girl (which made her endearing un Working Girl - I guess she never grew up...). Not a fan of the young woman who plays the granddaughter either. She's just a mean person. This could gave been good with better casting and use of the GOOD cast (Voight, Caan, Polo).

Notice the dates

[RoccoPepe · 11 July 2019]

The Original Movie was made in 2016. Many of these comments were made after the sequel was filmed. I truly enjoyed working with this crew again.

Waste of Time and Talent *Spoiler Alert*

[mcmiller53 · 2/10 · 28 August 2016]

For starters, if the J.L. ranch is 100 years old, I'll eat my own Stetson. Unless grand daddy built the first suburb in 1990s California. So, we begin with a cheap looking house, inside and out, that everybody fights over.

The plot, however, is authentically old. Dallas did it better and for a lot longer. the ranch is at risk by super long grudge-holding neighbor but it's saved by the small town sheriff and a sudden unexplained wave of support from other neighbors who earlier said sorry you're on your own with this.

All of this could be fixed but only with good writers, less plastic surgery, more Melanie Griffith glamor. Stiff, unconvincing acting from potentially great actors which boggled my mind.

I think Hallmark is trying to lay the ground work for a series because they left us, at the end, with only a reprieve for the ranch and the biggest plot which is that each sparring family are related through the grand daughter.

Watching Teri Polo scowl for two hours was really annoying, Voight mumbled and stumbled around with little passion except maybe for the paycheck and Caan looked drunk.

Throw out the house, most of the actors and shoot the writers and you're good. Or, again, just rewatch Dallas. They did it right.

Love the older cast but plot is too monotone

[SunnyDaise · 6/10 · 11 March 2021]

I love the age range of these characters and the fact Hallmark has offered something other than a rom(com) or murder mystery, but this movie is too negative. Whilst so many tensions in one family/community is realistic, it's exhausting to watch with not enough light relief to give the movie balance early on. I gave up, for now at least.

Maybe I just think too much..

[dujmqgwcx · 3/10 · 29 September 2020]

I'm no expert, but I don't think livestock in Kentucky is in danger from wolves. I didn't realize this was supposed to be Kentucky until the reviews said it. I assumed it was like Montana or somewhere where there might possibly be a wolf, and that much snow. I also found the plot that Caan's character shot his own son very bazaar. If Voight's character had been the Sheriff at that time, wouldn't he have known that the fellow rancher shot his own son?? If he didn't know, were they trying to say he shot his son, kept it a secret, buried the body and just said he ran off and never came back?? Why did his wife, who I assume was the mother, making her the grandmother of Polo's daughter, just sit there at the restaurant ?? Did she not know her husband shot their son?? Did he just bury his son in a pasture and tell everyone he ran away? If people knew about it, why was there no consequences for him? Very confusing plot!! I just watched this for the first time, because I saw the new one was on and hadn't seen the original one. I guess maybe I just think too much, but there were a lot of confusing and nonsensical plot lines here. You can't just shoot people and carry guns into federal agents homes. How did he even know where the agent lived!?! Anyhoo... I'll watch the new one, I may be even more flummoxed after that!!

Waste of time and talent

[stitchnpix · 1/10 · 23 August 2016]

Dry and boring 2 hours of time brought to you by Hallmark about a ranchers family headed by Jon Voight who is threatened to losing part of their farm on a false technicality spearheaded by James Caan - Voights rival. Many extra and unnecessary characters undeveloped that eat up time. Bad acting all around. Hallmark can definitely do better than this. Total waste of James Caan, Jon Voight and Melanie Griffith. Real disappointment. Too much hype for the last 6 months only to be let down. Nice theme music and locals in Kentucky,though. Quality Stetson- like hats. Well disciplined horses. Melanie Griffith's makeup was done nice,too. That's all.

Voight and Caan act and look as if the worms were already at work on them.

[gordonm888 · 3/10 · 21 August 2016]

J L Family Ranch, or J L Ranch, is a horrible money, even as judged by Hallmark TV movie. It is bad in almost every way that a movie can be bad.

Jon Voigt, who is apparently too old to move or act, begins to understand that there is a legal threat to his ownership of his family ranch. What follows is a long series of emotionless, whispered conversations between various family members and with other townspeople. A variety of side plots are introduced concerning daughters, grandchildren, etc. We meet Voigt's lifelong enemy, played by James Caan. The two septuagenarian actors, Caan and Voight, have a whispered showdown that was surely intended to be dramatic and intense - but instead is a snooze-fest.

The plot has a glacial pace. It is also absurd - Voight never gets a lawyer, but instead encourages his neighbors to come to his property and have a shoot-out with the federal agency representatives. A senator is trying to divert federal money to a solar company he owns (really?) and he needs the water on Voight's land - huh? What? Then a helicopter swoops down with a miraculous solution to the problem. Aw c'mon, was this written by a school kid?

The acting is non-existent. Voight and Caan both act and look as if the worms were already at work on them - both look mildly bewildered as they deliver their lines, as if they are unsure of where they are.

The directing is terrible - unclear story-telling, bad lighting, dull camera-work, poor editing, bad musical score.

The pace of the movie is slow, slow, slow, and relies on whispered conversations to advance the action.

This film has no action, no humor, no narrative tension and almost no romance. And the film's ending defies credulity, and also manages to be unsatisfying and inconclusive. A genuinely bad film on every level.

Thank You Hallmark!

[Jazzie-too · 10/10 · 27 September 2020]

I enjoyed it! Just seeing it for the first time! What a rich cast. I think it's rather cute--especially the part played so well by Jon Voight! CAn't wait to see the sequel! I wasn't expecting "Dallas"; that was truly a powerful feature series. And in a different era. We don't even get ANY westerns anymore--if not for Kevin Kostner, once in awhile. I just don't get why so many people went out of their way to be so critical and down right mean in their reviews.

This isn't a movie...

[matthewmercy · 2/10 · 12 April 2018]

Don't go near this. The UK release is actually a re-branding of a US TV movie called JL Family Ranch which appears to have been the pilot film for a proposed show that never went anywhere. It sets up lots of conventional, boringly-done threads of family drama (feuds, money worries, mother-daughter disputes, problems with alcoholism and gambling etc), which go almost nowhere because the whole thing is over in an hour and a half, all left unresolved pending the follow-up series that never came. Even the central plot about property ownership fraud isn't closed off properly.

What this is definitely not is what it has been promoted as in non-US markets; the UK DVD artwork (featuring a rifle-toting Jon Voight standing amongst squad cars and armed police officers) and replacement title of Texas Blood peg it as some kind of mash-up of Lonely Are the Brave, First Blood, and Harry Brown, with an old-time cowboy resorting to violent resistance in the face of persecution by his enemies and corrupt authorities. Just so you know - there are two gunshots in the whole thing, when fatherly rancher Voight scares some wolves off his land at the very start. The rest is tedious, uninvolving talk, with Teri Polo pulling emotive faces, a plastic-surgery ravaged Melanie Griffith unrecognisable (if not for her name in the credits I wouldn't have known it was her), and an ancient James Caan looking like he was going to bust every blood vessel in his head at any second.

As a lead-in for a TV series it is lacking, and you can see why the show didn't get picked up. As a movie...well, this isn't a movie. The earlier reviewer called 'BaronessFC-209-7408351' is having an absolute laugh raving so much about this thing; one can only assume they are related to / friends with those who made it, or else have some financial interest in it themselves.

Movie is okay, actress for Lynn is BEYOND AWFUL

[jodionlineshopping · 4 October 2020]

Plastic, fake ... so overdone with surgery and makeup, her acting completely underwhelming.

Right-wing Propaganda + Bad Acting = Terrible Movie

[plbogen · 1/10 · 2 September 2016]

Its basically a winking two hour glorification of domestic terrorists like Cliven Bundy.

Dry, boring, slow, incomprehensible, convoluted and infuriating are the best ways to describe it.

Voight's character at his best is a clueless idiot who has no understanding of the legal system, management, or pretty much anything other than pointing a gun at federal agents.

Caan's character is illogical and seemed to be based on Western villains. I'm surprised he never tied a damsel to a train track.

Total waste of time.

Bad, real bad

[vecihi-163-794278 · 1/10 · 31 March 2021]

Watching paint dry could be more exciting. Bad plot, script, bad acting. I cannot believe that people are capable of producing such bad film. I had to stop watching. An insult to intellect. A very bad copy of the series "Dallas". Need I say more?

Too short for a meaningful story

[d_welland · 5/10 · 22 July 2018]

Just felt too short for any story to actual be told. So many characters and 30-60 minutes more could have brought their stories to life rather than just introduce them and move along. What was there was brilliant and this was heading to be an 8-9 until I realised I was 1:15 through and the build to the end was coming

What goes on in La Grange, Kentucky ?

[rjaddou · 1/10 · 15 April 2019]

This disaster of a film managed to gather very old actors and stick them in La Grange, Kentuck for a few weeks to make a Western. Well, they thought they did, and they HAVE ... sort of ! I almost fell asleep about 15 minutes in, and it quickly got worse after that ... I doubt if anyone connected with this movie would be proud enough to admit it ! The question which must be asked is WHY make it?? And after all the money and the effort expended ... what is there to put about it in their CVs ? Please avoid this movie, even if you have low blood pressure !

JL Family Ranch

[BaronessFC-209-740835 · 8/10 · 1 September 2016]

JL Family Ranch was so blessed to have the caliber of Voight and Caan in the leads that the whole project became grander. Story was solid and the cinematography was rich, Wow. For a film that was budget challenged, the whole cast did such a great job they left me wanting more. Lots of plots but each one explained through the slow rollout of the story lines of the Lansburg family members. Loved the storyline of Rebecca and Lisa. Introduction of Terrance and Brady was full of promise for interesting things to come. And especially enjoyed Sheriff Whitlock watch the animosity of Lansburg and Petersen to see if that keg of powder was going to blow. Then, the romantic tension between the Sheriff and Rebecca was delicious to watch, to see if he could rope her. Sheriff Whitlock was trying but Rebecca's old wounds, current family dramas and Tap Petersen's legal shenanigans gave Rebecca a reason to avoid answering the draw she could not ignore for the Sheriff. Director and Crew gave this modern western a great look at what Americana is and took chances that gave this movie room to fill the screen. Director used all his skills to fill this JL Family Ranch story with all they could chuck in there.

dropped straight into a soap opera

[sarajimi · 1/10 · 13 February 2021]

I recently tried to watch a when calls the heart movie without having seen the show. this was worse. the family is massively dysfunctional. the movie starts with an argument and doesn't go more than two minutes without at least one more. not only is there drama within the family (more what you'd expect from dallas than hallmark), but there are multiple tangled plot lines including the whole town. there is no introduction to the characters that isn't drama free making all of them unlikeable from the start and they don't get better in the first half. i stopped watching.

snow or no snow!

[davyd-02237 · 4/10 · 29 June 2019]

Given this film is about 72 hours (apprx) in the life of a ranch, quite a number of shots show the ranch and town covered in snow and equally quite a few shots show the same areas with NO trace of snow, which is rather a puzzle. Im guessing the version we watched on freeview 48 was heavily edited as it didn't seem to flow from start to finish. James Caan looked seriously aged. Jon Voight equally tired of holding everything together. I would hardly call this entertaining and its yet another Goliath v David story

Two well-known males could not save this movie

[vantamn2 · 2/10 · 27 September 2020]

Why in the world would casting put Sklyer Shaye as Teri Polo's daughter. Terrible dialogue; terrible acting; terrible storyline.

Texas feud

[bkoganbing · 5/10 · 26 September 2020]

A couple of veterans Jon Voight and James Caan are the patriarchs of a pair of Texas Montagues and Capulets and have had a family feud going on back 3 generations. It has to do with the involvement of Caan's son and Voight's daughter and what happened with them started the feud.

Caan's grown rich in material things and Voight has a nice family and a big ranch and makes out OK. But Caan for reasons both venal and egotistical is trying very hard by hook or crook to steal some more of Voigt's land. That piece has a well and waters his and other neighbors around him.

The two vets outstrip the others in the cast. Just calling them vets makes me feel old as I remember them both as breakout stars. The ending is right out of Frank Capra.

Nice film for family wntertainment.