You probably remember his portrayal as the VUP in Ocean's 13, a hapless schmoe who gets stunk in bed with bugs and poisoned at dinner, but David Paymer is one of those guys that you say, yeah, THAT GUY. What's his name, honey? He was in that movie, you know the one, the one with THAT GUY.
Anyway, his character -- name of Hugh Packer or something (wink wink) was Bell's hero growing up, and he wanted to be a rich polluting elitist with magazine covers just like him. Turns out, THAT GUY is responsible for poisoning the soil by dumping cadmium at his factory, and now Bullcrap Heap has a patient whose lungs are vanishing. I swear, she loses three bra sizes in the first twenty minutes.
Oh, and they have to make her very sympathetic, because she has "no family", except for a sister living in Mexico with her 8 children who probably has no time, she says, to visit. And of course, she can't get a lung transplant because she had cancer as well. But, DAMN! She looks good, and despite having no lungs, breathes, sighs, talks, hopes and dreams of polyester plastic alveoli inserted into her chest.
Meanwhile little Donnie Dark can't walk because he's crippled, except it's psychosomatic. The two meat heads that are his parents are outraged that the doctors suggest it's in his head slobber on about how they had spent all this time trying to get him to walk -- but don't mention the dead brother, little Derek Dark who perished in a housefire.
The solution to his predicament is to put a really crappy VR simulation headset (probably a Croculus Schitt) with really bad graphics and animation. But, VOILA! it works, of course, because good intentions. So he takes a few laps around the hospital to impress his bovine parents.
Meanwhile, after Bell has had a confrontation with THAT GUY where he gives back his OMNI cover, he uses his Quack-Fu to convince THAT GUY to solve the lung problems. Which he does. Even better than Geordie LaForge could.
So the fantasy lungs work in fantasyland and the sister from Mexico visits without her kids. "It's hokay, I jus' leave them with the neighbor, he don't mind."
Final scene, Bell screws over his boyhood hero by claiming that he's going to fix everything and take all the blame. THAT GUY is apoplectic as Bell whispers in his ear, "Don't worry about it, you'll thank me in the end, Dude!"
FADE TO BLACK WHILE THAT GUY HAS A STROKE.
Disclaimer: Hugh Packer never made printers, OK? And Little Donnie Dark is not a reference to the Rabbit Mask movie, it's a reference to Butterflies are Free.
ZERO out of 10.
Anyway, his character -- name of Hugh Packer or something (wink wink) was Bell's hero growing up, and he wanted to be a rich polluting elitist with magazine covers just like him. Turns out, THAT GUY is responsible for poisoning the soil by dumping cadmium at his factory, and now Bullcrap Heap has a patient whose lungs are vanishing. I swear, she loses three bra sizes in the first twenty minutes.
Oh, and they have to make her very sympathetic, because she has "no family", except for a sister living in Mexico with her 8 children who probably has no time, she says, to visit. And of course, she can't get a lung transplant because she had cancer as well. But, DAMN! She looks good, and despite having no lungs, breathes, sighs, talks, hopes and dreams of polyester plastic alveoli inserted into her chest.
Meanwhile little Donnie Dark can't walk because he's crippled, except it's psychosomatic. The two meat heads that are his parents are outraged that the doctors suggest it's in his head slobber on about how they had spent all this time trying to get him to walk -- but don't mention the dead brother, little Derek Dark who perished in a housefire.
The solution to his predicament is to put a really crappy VR simulation headset (probably a Croculus Schitt) with really bad graphics and animation. But, VOILA! it works, of course, because good intentions. So he takes a few laps around the hospital to impress his bovine parents.
Meanwhile, after Bell has had a confrontation with THAT GUY where he gives back his OMNI cover, he uses his Quack-Fu to convince THAT GUY to solve the lung problems. Which he does. Even better than Geordie LaForge could.
So the fantasy lungs work in fantasyland and the sister from Mexico visits without her kids. "It's hokay, I jus' leave them with the neighbor, he don't mind."
Final scene, Bell screws over his boyhood hero by claiming that he's going to fix everything and take all the blame. THAT GUY is apoplectic as Bell whispers in his ear, "Don't worry about it, you'll thank me in the end, Dude!"
FADE TO BLACK WHILE THAT GUY HAS A STROKE.
Disclaimer: Hugh Packer never made printers, OK? And Little Donnie Dark is not a reference to the Rabbit Mask movie, it's a reference to Butterflies are Free.
ZERO out of 10.
