Mag-13 Reviews

Enemies of the People (2009)

the lesson to be learned: don't take power from others unless you know how to wield it yourself

[10/10 · 19 July 2011]

One man gives an order to "solve" the problem of political opponents, 5 train 100 to kill. 100 train a thousand to kill, and now that the political problem has been solved, the new perceived problem is the ethnically impure. at what appears to be the fourth level, the killers do their work because they fear being killed. they have no one above them to kill, no decision makers, no traitors, so they kill below...farmers, children, seamstresses...so that they will not themselves be killed.

Those who loved doing the killing never take the blame. Those who hated it can't live with themselves and wonder how many "holes of hell" they must go into, and if they will ever be reincarnated as humans again.

The man at the top is remorseful, a child who grieves for how his thoughtlessness hurt his country. But he won't tell that to the cops.

Tremendous. Stunning documentary work.

The Crimson Petal and the White (2011)

Addictive

[10/10 · 21 April 2011]

Addictive, and not in a bad way. Sooo rich in character and setting. You feel dirty when you see the homeless old men, hopeless, skinny children, and the mentally gone, all whose skin is the same color as the coal smoke filth of London. You smell the urine in the streets as you follow Sugar from her whorehouse to the market. The whores you meet are vacant, empty souls eaten by diseases and beaten to pulp by cowardly customers.

There isn't anyone good in this story, but they're all marvelous.

Sugar plots imaginary revenge against her johns, and it's such a pleasure to see that she has some power, if only in her mind, over her miserable world.

Leap Year (2010)

Hey folks, it's a date movie.

[10/10 · 13 February 2011]

So many naysayers complain that Ireland and its people are misrepresented in this film, and that an Irish guy wouldn't go for a materialistic American.

Folks, it's a romantic comedy. And it's a movie. If you want the history of Ireland, there are plenty of movies out there that will teach you. This was a sweet, light romp through pretty sceneries and charming accents.

You hope what the ending will be, but they do give you a little twist that keeps you guessing for a few minutes.

I've seen it on TV several times in the entire, and several times in bits and pieces. Matthew Goode is a treat on the eyes, and Amy Adams makes a nice turnaround.

I'm giving it a 10 to counter all the 1s and 3s given by other folks. Don't want someone not to see it because it has only 6 stars.

Downton Abbey (2010–2015)

For Masterpiece Classics, it's not up to par

[3/10 · 30 January 2011]

Lovely clothes, locations, and I like the apparently unlikely relationships between the staff and the earl's family. But while I watch this show, which DOESN'T HAVE AN ENDING, I find myself scoffing or wincing at the unlikely plot. The evil downstairs help stay on even though they are caught stealing from, scheming against, and even causing the death of a member of the family. If the earl were really so nice, so forgiving, he'd have gone broke years ago because his tenants in and around Grantham, who are from whom most of those big landowners make their money, would have told him "the check's in the mail" and laughed behind his back.

Almost every character upstairs is an unlikeable cartoon. Matthew is too dreadfully dull and feckless for a lawyer. Mary is the lost rich girl. Edith is sort of cool, flirting with every man with a few bucks in his pocket, but she does only have one thread, doesn't she, to get Mary? The only admirable upstairs character is the sister who's trying to get the maid a secretarial position. And the fact that I can't remember her name is the fault of the writers, not of mine.

Downstairs the characters have interesting pasts, but boring presents. Fatherly Mr. Carson was a stage performer. Perfect Mr. Bates was a thief and a killer and what else. Thomas couldn't be more evil, at all times. Unless he's going to be a serial killer, he has to have a human moment sometimes. O'Brien is a bit more realistic. She has a bit of a soft spot for the lady, but is absolutely cruel to her peers.

Well, tonight I watched the end of Lovely Bones instead of catching the beginning of Downton Abbey. That is a very bad sign for me, for I love English period pieces.

The Missing (I) (2003)

stinker *Spoiler Alert*

[3/10 · 12 December 2010]

I love Cate Blanchett. She plays her characters with meat. Hers was a strong female character, but the poor script was a bit vague about her Christianity which is also a character in the story.

It went on about 30 minutes too long with all the spiritual BS. The magical powers and magical potions. Tommy Lee Jones, who cared about him? He was foolish and that hair was way too long for how thin it was. The natural drug stuff? with the eagle shadow, give me a break. The reality of rescuing your kid from a sex-slaver would be enough without the silly stuff.

Heck, when Aaron Eckhart was burritoed, I thought the movie was near the end. That was a memorable image, by the way. I can't get it out of my mind. That and Dot's small shoes. Those are the most memorable things about that movie.

The ending was dumb. It was like they got tired and went home without nicely wrapping things up.

The X Files: I Want to Believe (2008)

I'm watching it now and not feeling good about it.

[3/10 · 9 July 2009]

OK, sexual problems or not, I adore David Duchovny. And the Scully/Mulder romance is always sweet.

But when Scully is first approached to get Mulder involved with the missing FBI agent case, she acts as if she's going to a stranger's house. You get the feeling she and Mulder haven't seen each other in years when she walks into his house. And yet, midway through the movie, she says that they are living together.

And when the girl's car is forced off the road by the truck--the cops don't notice that her window was broken in backwards, or that there is paint on the side that the truck hit.

And the hospital's administrator-priest says he is determining medical practice by appealing to "the highest authority" and an entire conference table of doctors, Scully included, don't protest.

And the "Russians" are using German words. "Verstehe." And why would Scully care why the bugger priest said "Don't give up." Why does she get so immature about it? Like she needs his approval or recognition. Isn't she more together than that after all these years? And when they're chasing the Ruskie through town, have they never heard of shooting him in the leg? OK, now i'm going to finish watching this preposterousness because I'm in a hotel with limited cable.

Grease 2 (1982)

Maxwell Caulfield is edible

[7/10 · 15 February 2009]

How does he do that with his eyes? He slants them down and you see light pass through his green corneas. They look supernatural. I guess he has a bit of a chin problem, but those luscious lips that drip sex appeal are right there. And when he kisses Michelle Pfeiffer, he barely moves them. I love it when guys kiss like that.

OK, IMDb forces me to write 10 lines, so this is going to get really cheesy because it's all going to be about Maxwell Caulfield. First of all, he did a great job, quietly emoting throughout the whole movie. I mean, he had a shallow script to work with, but he made it heartfelt. Without wincing or puckering or sighing or vogueing, his deadpan face screamed heartache. Ouch! And Michelle Pfeiffer was good, too, for a start up.

Yeah, back to Caulfield...so where the heck did he end up? He did TV shows for years. What a waste of a perfect face, gorgeous eyes, and that soft voice that makes ME pucker!

Burn After Reading (2008)

Writing and Editing were Brilliant

[10/10 · 24 December 2008]

Well, I thought it was funnier than Lebowski. The plot kept you on the edge of your seat the entire time.

As far as the cast, Tilda Swinton is frigging scary in this movie. Her character made my stomach turn. I haven't seen Mexican, so this was the first time I saw Brad Pitt show his silly side and I liked it. Same with Frances Mcdormand's character's cluelessness. They both were so out of their usual characters.

Clooney was his usual brilliant self. Does he need a reliable housekeeper that will pamper him like he deserves? But it was the WRITING and the EDITING that were the real stars. I've seen a few Coen movies and this one is now my second favorite, after Hudsucker Proxy which was brilliance and class all wrapped up together.

Céline (2008 TV Movie)

3 questions and a comment

[5/10 · 29 August 2008]

I liked it. It got me thinking; otherwise, I wouldn't be writing here. I fell asleep for a few minutes(I was tired; the movie didn't bore me) and suddenly Rene's really bad toupee was replaced with a bald head. What made him take the toupee off? Second question: it says on his bio that Rene married and divorced twice before Celine, not once. Does Celine's mother ever mention that in the movie? Third: I thought the voice-over singer was better than Celine, who's sort of nasaly like Barbara Streisand. Who is Trish O'Brien? I can't find her online.

And now a comment: I love Enrico Colantoni, who played Rene. No matter who he plays, a sleepy lovability surrounds him. He's totally hot in Just Shoot Me!

Pretty Woman (1990)

Painfully bad script

[5 December 2007]

I love this movie, so I've seen it a hundred times and thus I know the lines before they're served. But unlike other films that I know by heart, A Room With a View or Dances with Wolves, for instance, the lines from Pretty Woman are embarrassingly bad. I just looked up its writer, who created several titles I've never heard of. Pretty Woman is a testament to Julia Roberts and Richard Gere's on screen chemistry, as well as to Rodeo Drive fashion. "Cop a squat?" Gimme a break.

I will say that her unsuccessful shopping foray on Rodeo Drive was an absolute pleasure, especially when she is finally being "sucked up" to.

Nice sight gags, too, like the father and son in the Rolls Royce both talking on cell phones. A child with a cell phone? Preposterous!

Knocked Up (2007)

Not Fair -- a Rip Off

[10/10 · 13 June 2007]

Is this the latest strategy for movie makers to squeeze money out of their vulnerable viewers: write a screenplay that is so funny that as you're laughing, you miss the next joke, forcing you to see the movie twice? Do the makers of this movie realize that movie admission is now beyond $9? That means, in order to catch all the jokes, I have to see Knocked Up a second time. And what happens if I again laugh at the A jokes, missing the B jokes? I could end up spending not $18, but $27 to enjoy just one film. Maybe I should bring a damp towel to the theater and press it tightly against my mouth so I don't make that horsey sound that I call a laugh. Will theater owners allow me to bring in "outside" towels? What a conundrum this movie has left me...in.

Becoming Jane (2007)

Oh Poo, we Americans must wait until August!

[10/10 · 2 May 2007]

And even then I'll have to drive 2 hours to a city to see it. Oh, when are we going to be able to pay $8 to download a brand new movie? Turn the theaters into Goodwill Stores. Yay! But seriously, it doesn't sound like Janeites like this Being Jane movie much. What do Janeites think of Kiera Knightley's Pride and Prejudice? I was bothered by that one, too. In fact, other than the annoyingly repetitive script, I believe the Andrew Davies P & P was the best I've ever seen. The dresses worn by Jennifer Ehle were certainly handsomer than Kiera's. And don't show me pigs in the courtyard. Pigs bring flies, and Mrs. Bennett wouldn't have allowed that. Mrs. Bennett was too fastidious about her reputation to have allowed sloppery in her home.

Well, there you have it, 10 lines about nothing. When all I really want to say is, "Pity me. I won't get to join the Being Jane fantasy until August." Hello, England. Your queen will be in my state's little town of Jamestown in about three weeks. She'll be here to see our continent's first English colonial town, started in 1607, I believe. Does she really have 40,000 acres at Balmoral? Jeez. Time to make it a public park since you guys are paying for it.

An Inconvenient Truth (2006)

I fell asleep several times.

[6/10 · 25 February 2007]

If you're the kind of person who reads the newspaper every once in awhile, there wasn't too much to surprise you in this movie. People who are clueless about their world and happen to attend the movie because their friends have dragged them there will be the most amazed by Gore's presentation. Several people discount the global warming propaganda, but the vast majority of scientists appear to agree with the makers of this film. The problem is that the film is a snooze. I love Al Gore as an administrator, but as a speaker, gawd! Zzzzzzzzz. I'm ashamed to admit that I wanted to be wowed with new material. Hey, did you hear of the science teacher that isn't allowed to show Inconvenient Truth? A parent found out and went to the school board.

Modern Daydreams (2001)

you must see these

[10/10 · 11 February 2007]

these are beautiful, beautiful short films. i mean four minutes. in them, a man working in cold, drab urban areas fantasizes, and daydreams about being out in the country. in my favorite one, he daydreams about dancing with cherry pickers, those telescoping baskets that phone repairpeople and professional painters use. in another, he daydreams about a backhoe. you can go to mitchell rose's website to see them all. he has other films too that are screaming funny. you can also find some of these on youtube. mitchell rose has an engineering degree as well as a dance degree. the dancer who stars in these films is jamey hampton, who is also a musician.

The Good Shepherd (2006)

am i the only one?

[8/10 · 27 December 2006]

Fantastic story. When it was over, I asked my son, who also loved it, what time it was. He said, "That was a 3 hour movie." Neither of us had any idea it had been that long. It felt like 20 minutes. Fantastic. Am I the only one, however, that realized that Wilson's son is not his child, that Margaret seduced him at the party to hide her pregnancy? She never tells him it is not his child because she wants to protect her son.

Also, I love not knowing at the end who threw the girl out of the plane: Wilson? the CIA? the KGB? OK, the odds are that Wilson had it done, but who knows? If he had already known it was going to happen, wouldn't he have shown up on time to his son's wedding?

OK, to those folks who said they hated it. Well, sorry it wasn't Casino Royale. Fact is, the CIA is even more boring than this. It wasn't meant to be an action film. It is more like a horror film that moves slowly through its acts. Think of it as Syriana for bookkeepers. It is full of suspense, but we learn an awful lot about how these spies work. There's a new spy movie out, about Robert Hansen, the FBI agent with 6 kids who sold secrets to the Russians and who put nude pix of his wife up on the internet without her knowledge. It takes a kind of kooky person to thrive in that covert environment.

The New World (2005)

Stunning, but play closed captions to understand the soft voice-over narrative

[9/10 · 26 July 2006]

Just like Thin Red Line, there is a soft, gorgeous, poetic voice-over narrative that tells the story. This helps the movie because an important part of the movie involves the misunderstanding between English and Indian languages.

It's a wonderful love story. It answers the question all young girls have when they first hear that story from their 3rd grade teacher: "Why did Pocahontas save John Smith's life, and why did she marry someone else instead of him?" The major parts were played very well. The voice-over narrative was a little too similar to Thin Red Line's..."Who are you. Who am I?" That kind of stuff. But if you suspend your disbelief, it adds to the artistry of it.

Seven Brides for Seven Brothers (1954)

It's all about courtin'

[10/10 · 19 April 2006]

This has to be one of the sexiest movies I've ever watched, similar to animal courtship rituals presented on nature shows. The robust sexual drive of the alpha male, Adam Pontipee, is represented in songs that are delivered strong as bull calls. You know he means business when he goes into town to find himself a wife.

His brothers yearn for their own ladies so they kidnap them from the same little town. And their hypocritically reluctant captives mew with horniness in the song, "When You Marry in June." The brothers, played by ballet dancers, are most attractive and their effeminate firewood-choppin' dance is the sexiest piece of choreography ever presented on silver screen, imho. Fake backgrounds are a hoot. Love the cows and lambs and pigs. I can almost taste the sorrel soup.

Wedding Crashers (2005)

vince vaughn worth seeing twice

[8/10 · 1 August 2005]

cool dry place, clay pigeons, wedding crashers...those are top of the line vaughn shows. especially clay pigeons and wedding crashers, although he's one hottie in cool dry place.

The script is what gives vince his vehicle. I can't believe a screenwriter would dare write something as quick as this in these mindless days.

this is a powerful role...powerfully wicked and funny. the plot is simple, but the characters are so bad, you never notice. i loved seeing the various ethnic weddings. Luke Wilson is a little thin compared to vince vaughn, but isla fisher and that pioneer doctor lady were good. actually, isla fisher was funny as hell. i love vaughn's acting, but i wouldn't want to actually know him. scary dude.

m

The MatchMaker (1997)

watch it again and again

[10/10 · 3 May 2004]

Absolutely watchable. Janeane Garafalo is funny and charming,

the characters are lovable. Irish music is beautiful. Scenery is

stunning. Makes you wish you were there.

Most complaints I read are that the Irish are stereotyped. Who

cares? This film doesn't want to change the world, just to

entertain, and so it does.

Better than Notting Hill, I watch this film every time I'm feeling

down. Great humor.

Go rent it.

Mag 13

Baraka (1992)

A must see for every global-minded person.

[22 January 2004]

This would be a perfect finish to a two-year world culture course that so many high schools offer. I highly recommend it for anyone. You will see things that you have never seen before, even if you consider yourself a world traveler. I am still trying to figure out where that crystal or mirror mosaicked church is.

Mag

Summertime (1955)

Painful to watch, pleasure to watch

[6 April 2002]

It's tough to watch such a beautiful man as Brazzi's character chase such a dried up spinster as Hepburn's character without thinking he's a gigolo or just plain horny. It's definitely a flawed love, with nowhere to go, but it is love, and acted perfectly. Hepburn's expectation that he's not trustworthy is symbolized by the red glass rip-off.

Also painful is the truth in her character's conflict. American women of the 50's and early 60's, especially women shamed by their unmarried state, were practically in bondage to conservative/Christian standards and were vulnerable to loss of job, home and friends if they strayed from the designated path.

Mag

Panic (2000)

Little boy actor is incredible

[23 March 2002]

A must-see. The real revelation was 6-year-old, Sammy, played by David Dorfman. Good God! He was extraordinarily comfortable with his lines. Did he even have lines or was he ad-libbing? It was beautful. Plus, he looks just like Tracy Ullman, so he was well-cast as her son.

Speaking of Tracy Ullman, her wonderful voice was missing. William Macy, though, was brilliant, as usual, playing many levels of a "sad man."

Himalaya (1999)

First buy a wide-screen TV

[12 March 2002]

The story is charming, innocent. I definitely recommend it. Please note that only one of the actors has ever acted before, and that was a bit part in "Seven years in Tibet." It IS an epic, as a previous post said. The making of it must have been one, too: crossing the Himalayan Mountains with 20 yaks loaded with bags of salt. There were some live stunts performed that blow away computer imaged stunts.

The only problem: it's set in letterbox and my crappy 27 inch TV didn't do the sprawling landscapes justice.

Mag

Songcatcher (2000)

Maggie Greenwald is COOOOOL.

[10/10 · 18 February 2002]

I had no idea until now that Maggie Greenwald also wrote and directed my favorite movie in the world, The Ballad of Little Jo. That figures...because Songcatcher is up there in the top 10. Strong women, remote landscapes, unusual romances, and intimate, revealing dialogue mark this lady's work.

Mag

Gilmore Girls (2000–2007)

Gone the way of ED

[15 February 2002]

Pretentious dialogue aside, this show lost me when Hollywood started to play loose with the mother's love-life. I don't want to know that she sleeps with her kid's teacher, then sleeps with her ex-husband, and all the while, the audience is rooting for her to commit to the one decent guy on the show. Don't mess with me, Hollywood. Don't string me along, cuz I won't bite more than once. I do agree, however, with the reviewer who said it's a good mother/daughter show. When my 7th grade daughter fusses about having too much homework, I remind her of her heroine, Rory.

Same thing happened with NBC's ED. Nice show, better dialogue than Gilmore Girls, but I don't want to see that guy whoring around when the girl of his (only God knows why) dreams lives just down the street.

Ick...can't anybody be celibate until they're a little more sure? ED should join Lorelai for a one-night stand.