laughalt Reviews

Two Million Stupid Women (2009)

Forgettable but fun, it is unabashedly stupid, but it does manage to entertain fairly consistently.

[10 November 2010]

TWO MILLION STUPID WOMEN A film review by Steve Rhodes Copyright 2009 Steve Rhodes RATING (0 TO ****): ** 1/2 TWO MILLION STUPID WOMEN is a title guaranteed to instantly capture the attention of potential viewers and to quickly infuriate every feminist. Both groups should relax, since the film is never as provocative as its title and it insults both sexes equally, making us all look like idiots at some point during the movie. While the film is nothing special, it is nice, silly fun. As we spend the night with Melissa, Anna and Todd, three young adults in their twenties, it's hard not to have a good time as they bicker and argue like friends do. Actors Sarah Hall, Katy Stoll and Mark R. Gerson give uniformly likable readings of Melissa, Anna and Todd. The movie's setup is just about as stupid as its title, but it works in a wacky kind of way. When we meet Melissa, it is her birthday. She is excited since this is the first birthday she's had when she has a boyfriend. On previous birthdays, she was between guys. Yep, you guessed it. JT (Trevor Downie), Melissa's current squeeze, quickly becomes her ex after she walks in on him cheating on her with, in her words, "a bimbo that looks like a swizzle stick." A plan. Melissa needs a plan to deal with her addiction to failed relationships. She comes up with one, and, while it is a plan of sorts, it's a pretty weird one. She will go to all of her previous "hook-ups" and get them to tell her then and there these exact words, "You're stupid, pathetic and I should leave you alone." Not surprisingly, most of the guys who have bedded her over the years refuse to go along with her precise scripting. Along the way, she also finds out that what she thinks happened with them sometimes didn't because she was too drunk to know. Forgettable but fun, TWO MILLION STUPID WOMEN is unabashedly stupid, but it does manage to entertain fairly consistently. TWO MILLION STUPID WOMEN runs a bit too long at 1:42.

Silent Sam (2009)

Cop GONE Bad!!

[8/10 · 9 November 2010]

Every demographic has its fantasy movie, its veritable fairytale. Hipsters have The Big Lebowski. Nerds have Scott Pilgrim vs the World. The Bernie Madoff set even has such an ideal tale in Wall Street.

Silent Sam fulfills a fantasy for a crazily-overlooked contingent of our populace: fat, balding middle-aged guys. And, my, oh my, does it ever hit the mark! Sam Ramirez, true to form is stuck in a living hell. His wife has a terminal illness, which she is only days away from dying from, his partner on the police force is trying to get him to cheat on said wife and, if that wasn't enough, there are a lot of stone cold criminals who would enjoy nothing more than to give him a pair of cement shoes and take him swimming in the Hudson. The criminals get one step closer realizing the cement shoes for Sam when they kill his partner and he begins massacring the mobsters in a bloody rage. Needless to say, lots of people die.

-Richard Snyder Intimidator of the Realm

Desdemona: A Love Story (2009)

Desdemona: A Love Story Review

[9/10 · 11 August 2010]

You can judge a movie often times by the feeling it gives you. Desdemona: A Love Story is very intriguing. This film has a unique way of taking in an audience, and never letting go. The emotions drawn from this film, is reminiscent of the sensations you get from a Shakespearian play. Watching this movie I was curious, angry, hopeful, sad, and very engaged beginning to end. Phillip Guzman creates this modern day Othello and fills it with love, passion, power, and rage, the perfect antidote for a remarkable drama. I saw a bunch of new faces in this movie, but the actors complimented their characters well. There was great dialogue, and a clever plot. This movie also pushes slightly on some moral, and racial issues. Over all, this was a powerful independent film.

The Truth (I) (2010)

The Truth is This Movie is Great!

[10/10 · 11 August 2010]

I am a big fan on independent movies. Although, The Truth never lets on to the fact that it isn't a "big budget" film. The movie is well scripted. There is also some star power in its line up of actors. The plot thickens heavily in the movie, as certain truths are tested. The director (Ryan Barton-Grimley) is obviously good at keeping secrets, and using them as triggers. Barton-Grimley allows the hidden truths to unravel so slightly, that you are holding your breathe for every baited answer. This movie was devilishly good. It was a thrill ride beginning to end. I would definitely recommend this film. Audiences will indisputably get some adrenaline from this heart pumping thriller.

Spike (2008)

Twisted Remake of Beauty and The Beast

[10/10 · 4 August 2010]

Spike is a great Independent Horror Film. This movie reminds me of the kind spirit buried within the "Beast", from the classic tale of "Beauty and the Beast". Throughout the film, you transition from fearing "Spike" to feeling for him. The script was totally mastered by a believable cast of characters, who delivers flawlessly. I would recommend this film to all independent or "B" movie lovers. I was easily carried away by this romantic horror. I would definitely keep an eye on this film, I think its an obvious choice for cult classic status. I can see why Spike has won several independent movie awards. Robert Beaucage displays his talent for creating a "visual language of horror" in this innovative Gothic fantasy.

The Mini (2007)

DVD Review of The Mini

[8/10 · 10 May 2010]

If you looked up the word underdog in a dictionary, there you would find an image of Fran from the movie The Mini. No doubt this futon salesman from Boonville, Indiana is a kind soul who just keeps getting hit with the hard knocks of life. With just a handful of characters surrounding Fran's life, Maverick Entertainment gives a nice compelling satire of when the nice guy does actually finish first.

Not only is he in the running for a promotion to mattress sales, Fran's career path on climbing the ladder in the bedding environment is configured by his power to win the annual mini marathon race against the current mattress sales guru, Rick. The manager of the store Rick and Fran work at can only be described as an instigator at best, but Fran's belief in himself to take the race is strengthened by his best friend and trainer, Dale.

Even unlucky Fran gets lucky sometimes as he scores the last pair of free tickets to a concert featuring his favorite band and takes his newfound love Carmen. She is very supportive of Fran's endeavors, as is his Mom who knows that Fran's Dad won first place in the same race in the 1970's. And while the pressure is on for Fran to juggle his work and social status amongst his peers, he will not stop until his goal is accomplished.

There are some super funny scenes in the film, such as Fran using the expressway for his jogging purposes to get in shape for race day. The humorous tag lines used when answering the incoming calls at the bed mart, very creative approach. Lastly, Fran gets the final chuckle and everything ends as it should in this heartwarming tale where the underdog finishes first! Out on DVD everywhere May 11th and available OnDemand beginning in June! Health and Happiness! Janel Rana aka "Discount Diva" DiscountDiva.Multiply.com "Saving the world 1Qpon at a time!"

Hellbinders (2009)

Hellbinders DVD Review

[8/10 · 27 April 2010]

This is a great indy action flick distributed by Maverick Entertainment. You can pick up a copy 5/4/10 at your local retailers-BestBuy, Blockbuster, Walmart, Netflix,and Redbox.

Max is a fast talking mercenary willing to risk everything for the almighty dollar, but he has met his match when he agrees to take on a job to terminate the devil himself. With the help of an elite assassin and the last remaining member of the Knights Templar, Max prepares for battle. But will the team even stand a chance against the mightiest demon they all have ever faced?

Credits for actors in Hellbinders: Ray Park- Nominated for a Blockbuster Entertainment Award and a MTV Movie Award for his role in Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace. Starred in "Heroes," G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra, X-Men, Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace.

Johnny Yong Bosch - "Three Delivery," "Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers," "Paradise Kiss"

Esteban Cueto - Ultimate Champion, Delta Farce, Collateral Damage

Richard Cetrone -Nominated for a Screen Actors Guild Award for his stunt work on Iron Man and 300. Has done stunt work on: The Scorpion King, Iron Man, 300, Underworld, Mr. & Mrs. Smith

Ingrid Sonray - Sugar Valentine, Short Fuse

Randy Hall- Nominated for a World Stunt Award for his stunt work on Taxi and The Glass House. Has done stunt work on: Mission: Impossible III, Paycheck, The Italian Job, Se7en, Taxi, The Glass House

*Sponsored Post

Director (2008)

Review

[8/10 · 13 April 2010]

You definitely don't want to miss the hot Miami action in Director! Check out the synopsis: With only a hand-held camera to her name Adriana arrives in Miami to pursue her dream of becoming a famous director. She is hired on the spot by a couple of French producers, but the job is too good to be true, and Adriana has unknowingly played the role of accessory to robbery. Desperate to achieve notoriety any way she can, Adriana continues her illegal film work with the 'producers.' But will she get in too deep and compromise her dream? There are bank robberies, beautiful women, sick parties, badass guns, car chases, and not those low budget chase scenes either, I'm talking Ferrari on Lamborghini action. The first person camera work is shaky and did make me a little sick, but then again, a steadier shot would have taken away from the gritty feel of the film. So push past the nausea and keep watching, trust me, it's worth it!

A Numbers Game (2010)

A Numbers Game DVD Review

[8/10 · 23 March 2010]

"They just don't make salesmen like him anymore," definitely crossed my mind after watching the film, A Number's Game; starring Steven Bauer as Neil Black, the successful ego driven salesman, whose pitch is so hot, that he could sell snow to the Eskimos. Steven Bauer's leading role as Neil Black is undeniably the selling point for the film leaving the rest of the cast to consist of up and comers; Madison Walls, Ken Howard, and Hanna Hall. Bauer is famous for his role as Manny Ribera in the 1983 film ScareFace as well as Joey Pinero in Primal Fear (1996) and as Carlos Ayala in Traffic(2000).

Bauer's performance (and selling tactics) bring charisma to the film as does the throwback 80's wardrobe and the catchy tunes from the decade. Hold on to your Aquanet because this film is full of big, ultra-teased 80's hair styles that are reminiscent of a time when Madonna, MTV, Pac Man, and "Miami Vice" ruled the world. I thoroughly enjoyed the soundtrack which featured 80's hits "Wishing (If I had a Photograph of You)" by Flock of Seaguls, "Blue Monday" and "Love Vigilantes" by New Order, "La Grange" by ZZ Top, and "Ballroom Blitz" by The Sweet- just a few of my favorites.

The storyline is simple- Neil Black is a good looking schmoozer who can sell anything to anyone, literally. The beautiful Catherine (Madison Walls) doesn't seem to close deals as easily as Mr. Black (Steven Bauer) and soon realizes her sales room is headed for disaster. Not able to handle rejection or accept failure, Catherine is forced to hand over her sales team to Neil Black, and watch as he turns her unproductive lazy sales room into a prosperous and successful "money room." Basically, the plot focuses on the transformation of Catherine's failing sales room and the blossoming relationship between her and Neil Black. I thought the storyline was lacking a bit and without a doubt could have used a more intertwining plot. But I must say, Steven Bauer gave a stellar performance and it's his performance that really kept me watching the film. Watching Steven in another indie film was a plus, as he also starred in Nola (2000) which premiered at TriBeCa Film Festival in 2003. If you enjoy indie films with well-known actors, then definitely check it on DVD April 6, 2010.

Crushed (2009)

Movie Review of "She's Crushed"

[8/10 · 16 February 2010]

Here is the synopsis so you know what you're in for:Tara sets her sights on the unassuming guy-next-door, Ray, and their innocent flirting turns into a regretful one night stand. He is hoping to put the indiscretion safely behind him, but Tara makes it horrifically clear that she is more than willing to go to extremes to keep her man. Everyone that Ray cares about will pay for his reckless decision as they are all forced into a twisted game of love, torture, and death at the hands of sadistic Tara.

Whow, this film is sure to give you a scare!!! I love horror flicks and this one definitely left me shaking and also craving more. The plot is engaging and keeps you interested in what's gonna happen next. The thriller and suspense are in place and are intensified by the excessive amount of bloodshed(which is not lacking,lol)If you love horror flicks then check your local retailer for this cool indie thriller.

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London Betty (2009)

Coming soon on DVD!!!

[8/10 · 20 January 2010]

Hey Everybody!!! The date when you can get this great comedy is getting closer!!!! You are going to be able to buy this movie on February 2nd, 2010. You can go to your local stores and check it out! I got the chance to see this movie in a preview show, and I can tell you that I had a great time! It is funny, and keeps your attention through out the whole movie. It is good to mention that "London Betty" won different awards as Best Connecticut film at the Silk City Film Festival, and also Best Feature Film at the Accolade Film Competition. So now you know, the date is coming closer, and it is for sure that I am going to get this movie on Feb 2nd! Don't miss it!!! *Sponsored Post.

The Two Plates (2010 Video)

Check out your local stores!!!

[19 January 2010]

Hey guys, The movie "The Two Plates" is coming soon on DVD! Check your local stores to get it staring February 9, 2010. It is a great independent movie where you can see suspense, drama, action, and much more. It is about how two brothers of the hood come across counterfeit plates used to make US currency. If you like to watch movies with street fights, this would be a great option. This movie won Best Urban Feature Film at the Bare Bones International Film Festival, and Wes Reid (one of the principal characters) won Best Actor at the Bare Bones International Film Festival for his role in the film Clay. *Sponsored Post

Trapped in Katrina (2009)

Nice!

[10 December 2009]

I got the opportunity to watch Trapped in Katrina, and I think is a movie that would take you a little closer to what happened in New Orleans when this city was hit by the hurricane Katrina. You get to see all the destruction that this force of the nature did to New Orleans, and to the people that lived there. Surviving to the hurricane does not mean that you are saved, it actually means that the nightmare beings. Realizing that you lost everything I would say is the hardest part, and from there, you will see that Hilton and Amelia don't have anything but each other. Desperation can make you do things you would never imagine, and Hilton and Amelia would show the extreme example of this.

Kush (2007)

Pretty Good Movie

[5/10 · 17 November 2009]

I saw Kush and yes it is like the Alpha Dog movie but it is still good and the actors are good. If you like Alpha Dog you will like this. I enjoyed the actors struggle with trying to leave the drug business but being connected through ties with the family and the friends and money that made it hard to leave. I actually enjoyed Kush better than Alpha Dog because the characters seemed more real to me. There was a lot of action going on and the story was interesting the whole way through it made the point and did not drag on unnecessarily. I was really surprised to see William Atherton from Ghostbusters and James Duval from Gone With Sixty Seconds they made the movie better.