I wasn't expecting much when I got this from Netlfix,especially after reading a review of it on bad movies.org.I don't know if the filmmakers were trying for a Troma-type movie or what,but they succeeded in making a silly/stupid one.I got tired of the "Cut the frabber-jabber" and the hillbillies over-overacting every chance they could after the first 20 minutes.I know they were going for laughs and they did succeed in a few scenes,but after a while,it was annoying.Very annoying.And the guy playing Waldo was annoying.Even Eddie Deezen was never that annoying! The girls looked good,of course,but,is that all?? For some,maybe.I guess it's good to check it out once,if you want to spend 80 minutes of your life,but,also,I guess that's not a bad thing either.There are worse things to spend it on,right?? Right??? So,sit back,have a few beers and enjoy! Make fun of it,if you like.God knows there's plenty of stuff to make fun of.There are no big stars in it.No special effects.Bad jokes.Low budget.The alien comes from a planet of vegetables???? Huh??? Check it out..Maybe you won't hate yourself in the morning...
19 Reviews
Galactic idiocy...
barnthebarn12 July 2008
Same story really...Titan productions (Charles Band label) release awful Gorman Bechard movie that has extremely low production values, largely terrible acting, horrid script and is generally terrible.
Toni Whyte as Kelly is rather delightful in (two) small roles but she never did anything else. To be honest she is the only decent thing about this crass, ludicrous excuse of a movie. Bechard is a talentless hack who was presumably only lucky enough to have films released by Full Moon because they are greedy. Having said that I'd be surprised if his three films released by them actually made much return. Best aspect of this film? The classy artwork on the DVD sleeve.
Toni Whyte as Kelly is rather delightful in (two) small roles but she never did anything else. To be honest she is the only decent thing about this crass, ludicrous excuse of a movie. Bechard is a talentless hack who was presumably only lucky enough to have films released by Full Moon because they are greedy. Having said that I'd be surprised if his three films released by them actually made much return. Best aspect of this film? The classy artwork on the DVD sleeve.
No Giggle-O
NoDakTatum5 November 2023
The cast and director who brought us the fitfully funny "Psychos in Love" return with a cinematic lesson on how NOT to make a low budget comedy. I use the term "comedy" loosely since there is nary a laugh here. A giant broccoli (Carmine Capobianco) wins a trip to Earth, where he can have all the sex with local women that he wants. On Earth, he is followed by a gangster and his stupid henchmen, and some Jewish rednecks. He is also tailed by a spunky reporter who wants to write a book about him, and a nerdy photog who takes pictures of the alien sex. There is a fight scene where the rednecks and gangsters want to kidnap the alien for their own purposes...there is some nudity...cuss words...that cute leading lady who looks like Molly Ringwald...I'm getting sleepy...
As with "Psychos in Love," this is also essentially plotless. Cabobianco does not have the same goodwill he had in the earlier film, coming off as a complete pervert. There are not as many smart jokes, either. The rednecks and the gangsters' many scenes are so unfunny they are embarrassing. The climactic fight scene drags on forever, and the movie thankfully ends in under an hour and a half. While "Psychos in Love" played with film making conventions and genres, "Galactic Gigolo" just plays like the cable version of really bad amateur porn. Gorman's direction seems to consist of nailing the camera to the floor and leaving the room. The cast is terrible here, and the locations mostly consist of people in their living room watching TV. All of these scenes may have taken place in the same house... Bechard also directed the equally terrible "Disconnected," and something I have not seen called "Cemetery High." His stab at being New Haven's answer to John Waters is a failure.
As with "Psychos in Love," this is also essentially plotless. Cabobianco does not have the same goodwill he had in the earlier film, coming off as a complete pervert. There are not as many smart jokes, either. The rednecks and the gangsters' many scenes are so unfunny they are embarrassing. The climactic fight scene drags on forever, and the movie thankfully ends in under an hour and a half. While "Psychos in Love" played with film making conventions and genres, "Galactic Gigolo" just plays like the cable version of really bad amateur porn. Gorman's direction seems to consist of nailing the camera to the floor and leaving the room. The cast is terrible here, and the locations mostly consist of people in their living room watching TV. All of these scenes may have taken place in the same house... Bechard also directed the equally terrible "Disconnected," and something I have not seen called "Cemetery High." His stab at being New Haven's answer to John Waters is a failure.
It's no "Psychos in Love"...
Dandypair20 July 2000
I picked up this movie in the cult section of the video store because it had the same director, writer, and cast as the brilliant "Psychos in Love". But unlike PIL, this was just plain awful, lacking the humor, satire, and everything else that made PIL good. Avoid this at all costs, but check out Psychos in Love if you get a chance.
Unwatchable
13Funbags1 August 2018
I can't believe this was made by the same guy who made Cemetery High. This movie is just hard to watch. I hated everyone and had a lot of trouble paying attention. The only interesting thing is that the set from the big shoot out in CH is in here.
Really freakin funny movie!
Hastor-219 May 2001
Its been a while since I saw this movie, I'm about to go look for it on ebay though. It is far from your typical hollywood comedy. It's nothing that your crowd that treats MTV as a religion is going to enjoy. But if you can enjoy something like Cannibal: The Musical, you'd probably like this. It isnt a musical, but it has that type of comedy that is so bad that it had to take a lot of thought and creativity to achieve such badness, and it can be enjoyed on that level. It is obviously low budget, and that just adds to the overall feel. If you're a fan of Full Moon or Troma movies, especially their lesser known pick-ups such as "Invasion of the Space Preachers" - then you'll love this movie!
This movie is awful
ThePanos16 March 2005
Painfully horribly awful. It looks like seven people from the cast voted for it. The only reason this movie hasn't made the worst 100 is simply because not enough people were bored enough to see it.
I had a habit of collecting used unheard off B movies and bought this movie maybe 6 years ago. I finally saw the whole thing 2 weeks ago. Why? Because I couldn't sleep. If you're suffering from insomnia this movie is for you. The story line is stupid, the characters are ridiculously unentertaining and the acting is worse than what you could expect to see at a school play.
Out of all the bad movies I have in my collection (and there are a lot) next to the one with the tag line "All the teachers wanted to FLUNK her" this has got to be the absolute worse movie I've ever seen.
On the plus side I did end up getting a good nights sleep.
I had a habit of collecting used unheard off B movies and bought this movie maybe 6 years ago. I finally saw the whole thing 2 weeks ago. Why? Because I couldn't sleep. If you're suffering from insomnia this movie is for you. The story line is stupid, the characters are ridiculously unentertaining and the acting is worse than what you could expect to see at a school play.
Out of all the bad movies I have in my collection (and there are a lot) next to the one with the tag line "All the teachers wanted to FLUNK her" this has got to be the absolute worse movie I've ever seen.
On the plus side I did end up getting a good nights sleep.
Probably the worst movie I have ever seen!
texcritc21 August 1999
That about sums it up. It is the worst movie I have ever viewed as of this date. I thought that it would be campy and humorous, but I was sorely mistaken. This is an ultra-poor quality film (in all aspects of the word poor) which tries to mask itself as a cult movie. Its largest problem, in my opinion, (besides the horrible acting and deplorable plot) is that it combines childish "Shining Time Station" type acting with some scenes of nudity and lesbianism. If it wasn't for the nudity, I would think that it was a kids film. But they throw that nudity in there so it doesn't appeal to any age group. It is too childish/silly for the teens/adults, and it has enough nudity in it that is not appropriate for children. I am not going to waste any more of my time on this horrible waste of magnetic tape (and the cardboard in the box that it came in).
Avoid
neil-47620 April 2009
Warning: Spoilers
This truly dire movie fails in every department. Specifically:
1. The script is meant to be funny but isn't;
2. The casting, starting with the leading man, is awful;
3. The acting is appalling;
4. The direction is witless;
5. The production values don't exist.
The title might lead you into thinking there is some titillation here; there isn't.
And with that revelation there disappears any reason whatsoever for watching this movie.
So I recommend that you don't.
1. The script is meant to be funny but isn't;
2. The casting, starting with the leading man, is awful;
3. The acting is appalling;
4. The direction is witless;
5. The production values don't exist.
The title might lead you into thinking there is some titillation here; there isn't.
And with that revelation there disappears any reason whatsoever for watching this movie.
So I recommend that you don't.
"Fame and fortune: two of my favorite F-words."
Hey_Sweden23 July 2023
Warning: Spoilers
Eoj is a sentient broccoli from another planet who, on an alien game show, wins an all-expenses paid trip to the Earth town of Prospect, Connecticut. Here, he takes the form of a "lovable sleazoid" (Carmine Capobianco), and his mission will be to bed as many willing Earth women as possible. Then, a family of Jewish rednecks (!) and a bumbling quartet of mobsters will be on Eojs' trail; the latter because they want to exploit the aliens' shape-shifting abilities.
Made by the same people behind "Psychos in Love", this isn't clever and engaging like that cult comedy, although the main actors are likeable enough not to be faulted. This movie, in comparison, is more tiresome than genuinely funny, although occasionally it does have a better gag or line than expected. The stereotypical gangsters are spectacularly unfunny, which really drags their scenes down. It's admittedly an amusing concept that a guy who looks like Capobianco would be this irresistible stud, and the action does finish with a patently ridiculous finale in which both the mob guys and the rubes get what's coming to them.
On the plus side, there are some very sexy ladies here (in particular, Ruth Collins, Donna Davidge, and Angela Nicholas), and leading lady Debi Thibeault is appealing as the reporter who wants Eojs' story. And the music score is hilariously cheesy.
Stupid (and sleazy) and proud of it, "Galactic Gigolo" wasn't a total waste of time for this viewer, but he would recommend that people either check out or re-visit "Psychos in Love" instead.
And there you have it....
Five out of 10.
Made by the same people behind "Psychos in Love", this isn't clever and engaging like that cult comedy, although the main actors are likeable enough not to be faulted. This movie, in comparison, is more tiresome than genuinely funny, although occasionally it does have a better gag or line than expected. The stereotypical gangsters are spectacularly unfunny, which really drags their scenes down. It's admittedly an amusing concept that a guy who looks like Capobianco would be this irresistible stud, and the action does finish with a patently ridiculous finale in which both the mob guys and the rubes get what's coming to them.
On the plus side, there are some very sexy ladies here (in particular, Ruth Collins, Donna Davidge, and Angela Nicholas), and leading lady Debi Thibeault is appealing as the reporter who wants Eojs' story. And the music score is hilariously cheesy.
Stupid (and sleazy) and proud of it, "Galactic Gigolo" wasn't a total waste of time for this viewer, but he would recommend that people either check out or re-visit "Psychos in Love" instead.
And there you have it....
Five out of 10.
best enjoyed intoxicated
allrealityisvirtual19 December 2006
Most people fail to see the charm of this little movie, but I think its just misunderstood. Sure the script is cheesy, the acting overdone, the music B-grade porn and the vegetable suits aren't fooling anybody (we know there's humans under that green makeup!) but that is the point. This is a movie about vegetables, made by vegetables, that explores the ultimate vegetable fantasy - having sex with every human woman in town. In order to fully understand things from a vegetable's point-of-view you must become a vegetable yourself; be it from drink, drugs or days of sleep deprivation.
Need further help achieving the appropriate level of braindeadliness? Check out psycho_sapiens' Galactic Gigolo drinking game on the message board! Irresistible broccoli, incestuous hasidic rednecks, gangster stooges, gonzo journalists, perverted cameramen, sex and boobies - this movie has everything! 2 thumbs up, just remember to switch your brain off first.
Need further help achieving the appropriate level of braindeadliness? Check out psycho_sapiens' Galactic Gigolo drinking game on the message board! Irresistible broccoli, incestuous hasidic rednecks, gangster stooges, gonzo journalists, perverted cameramen, sex and boobies - this movie has everything! 2 thumbs up, just remember to switch your brain off first.
Galactic Gigolo surpasses the rhetorical disaster you might anticipate
kevin_robbins14 December 2023
I recently viewed Galactic Gigolo (1987) on Tubi. The storyline revolves around an alien vegetable winning the opportunity to change forms and experience two weeks of sex and fun on Earth. Upon arrival, a reporter, amazed by the alien's charm and abilities, follows him around, documenting his escapades.
This picture is directed by Gorman Bechard (Friends with Benefits) and stars Carmine Capobianco (Psychos in Love), Debi Thibeault (Cemetery High), Frank Stewart (Death Collector) and Ruth Collins (Sexpot).
Despite its low budget, the film showcases creativity and unexpected artistic elements. The comedic content has its hits and misses, featuring random funny moments, good one-liners, and unique characters. While the sets may be weak, they hold a certain interest. With numerous topless scenes, the overall concept surprised me with its entertainment value.
In conclusion, Galactic Gigolo surpasses the rhetorical disaster you might anticipate. I would score it a 4.5/10 and recommend watching it once with the appropriate expectations.
This picture is directed by Gorman Bechard (Friends with Benefits) and stars Carmine Capobianco (Psychos in Love), Debi Thibeault (Cemetery High), Frank Stewart (Death Collector) and Ruth Collins (Sexpot).
Despite its low budget, the film showcases creativity and unexpected artistic elements. The comedic content has its hits and misses, featuring random funny moments, good one-liners, and unique characters. While the sets may be weak, they hold a certain interest. With numerous topless scenes, the overall concept surprised me with its entertainment value.
In conclusion, Galactic Gigolo surpasses the rhetorical disaster you might anticipate. I would score it a 4.5/10 and recommend watching it once with the appropriate expectations.
A comedy that's a failure
Wizard-825 March 2011
The people who made this movie previously made the cult movie "Psychos In Love", a movie that I found funny enough to justify buying it on DVD. So my expectations were pretty high when I put "Galactic Gigolo" in my DVD player. This effort does have a somewhat higher budget that "Psychos In Love" (there are a LOT more actors for one thing), and occasionally there is a sight gag, a one-liner, or some other attempt at humor that makes you smile. But otherwise, this movie is a complete failure. The movie feels like it was being made up as it goes along, with no proper story and character motivations that are murky. (The character of "Eoj", who should be the central figure, is actually kind of an afterthought frequently.) But the main reason why the movie fails is that it is extremely unfunny, using tired stereotypes, unimaginative gags, and feeling that people running around and screaming is hilarious. Skip this movie and rewatch "Psychos In Love" instead.
Filmic vampirisim
Groverdox13 January 2019
It's hard to write anything about "Galactic Gigolo". I start writing this review while it is still playing to distract myself from it. It is sucking out my energy. My veins are starting to hurt.
The movie doesn't really have a story, but it's premise is about a talking piece of broccoli (a man wearing a broccoli suit) being turned into a balding schlub and sent to Earth to have sex. He has no problem whatsoever scoring with Earth women, not that the movie shows you that. In one scene he gives a press conference and demonstrates how he can change into a cat.
A group of rednecks, mafiosi and orthodox Jews apparently all live in the same house and take an interest in the alien.
There's a lot of hijinks. At least that's what I call it. Stuff going on that could be funny, I guess, in another movie made decades before this one when the jokes were fresh. You get the impression it's supposed to be funny because of the zany music. But it's just so boring. And tiring. Makes you feel tired, watching people running around and falling over. Especially when they're doing it for no discernible reason. People also get pies in the face.
Eoj, the broccoli man, is followed by a journalist. I can't keep this up. I can't write any more. There's nothing more to write anyway. This movie is making my skull feel fragile.
The movie doesn't really have a story, but it's premise is about a talking piece of broccoli (a man wearing a broccoli suit) being turned into a balding schlub and sent to Earth to have sex. He has no problem whatsoever scoring with Earth women, not that the movie shows you that. In one scene he gives a press conference and demonstrates how he can change into a cat.
A group of rednecks, mafiosi and orthodox Jews apparently all live in the same house and take an interest in the alien.
There's a lot of hijinks. At least that's what I call it. Stuff going on that could be funny, I guess, in another movie made decades before this one when the jokes were fresh. You get the impression it's supposed to be funny because of the zany music. But it's just so boring. And tiring. Makes you feel tired, watching people running around and falling over. Especially when they're doing it for no discernible reason. People also get pies in the face.
Eoj, the broccoli man, is followed by a journalist. I can't keep this up. I can't write any more. There's nothing more to write anyway. This movie is making my skull feel fragile.
Sadly no...
BandSAboutMovies10 June 2022
Warning: Spoilers
Also known as Club Earth and Galactic Gigolo, this movie comes from a strange source: Gorman Bechard, who made Psychos In Love and a movie that has obsessed me since I saw it the first time, the telephone-based slasher Disconnected.
Eoj (Carmine Capobianco, who co-wrote the movie with Bechard) is a game show winning sentient stalk of broccoli from the planet Crowak who is on an all expenses paid vacation to Earth, a place where he transforms into a man and discovers that he really likes to have sex with human women.
Bechard has disowned this movie thanks to Charles Band(he also made Assault of the Killer Bimbos and Cemetery High for Full Moon), who got way too involved in the color correction and editing of the film.
Debi Thibeault plays the reporter out to get the story of the alien, Ruth Collins from Lurkers and Prime Evil shows up as does LeeAnne Baker who is in Necropolis, a movie that more people should download directly into their brain.
It's not great, sexy or funny, but it is weird.
Eoj (Carmine Capobianco, who co-wrote the movie with Bechard) is a game show winning sentient stalk of broccoli from the planet Crowak who is on an all expenses paid vacation to Earth, a place where he transforms into a man and discovers that he really likes to have sex with human women.
Bechard has disowned this movie thanks to Charles Band(he also made Assault of the Killer Bimbos and Cemetery High for Full Moon), who got way too involved in the color correction and editing of the film.
Debi Thibeault plays the reporter out to get the story of the alien, Ruth Collins from Lurkers and Prime Evil shows up as does LeeAnne Baker who is in Necropolis, a movie that more people should download directly into their brain.
It's not great, sexy or funny, but it is weird.
excruciating
babeulous15 December 2001
Ruth Collins is cute. See her in some other movie.
I expected a bad movie but it was worse. Looks like it was shot with a hand-held 8-mm camera and ambient lighting. Most of the dialog is unintelligible. Much of the action consists of running back and forth in the woods, Benny Hill style. The "actors" spend a lot of time sitting on sofas reading cue cards. This may have been an attempt at the kind of "indie" or "underground" look that "Troma" sometimes achieves, but it failed. And it's not bad in an interesting way (e.g. _Plan 9 from Outer Space_), it's just amateurish and dull. Don't waste your time. You have been warned.
I expected a bad movie but it was worse. Looks like it was shot with a hand-held 8-mm camera and ambient lighting. Most of the dialog is unintelligible. Much of the action consists of running back and forth in the woods, Benny Hill style. The "actors" spend a lot of time sitting on sofas reading cue cards. This may have been an attempt at the kind of "indie" or "underground" look that "Troma" sometimes achieves, but it failed. And it's not bad in an interesting way (e.g. _Plan 9 from Outer Space_), it's just amateurish and dull. Don't waste your time. You have been warned.
The Best Movie Since "Cannonball Run III" (the Canadian version)
Esteban Spielbergio17 December 1999
I loved this movie...it was better than the Star Wars trilogy. If you thought Darth Vader was funny, you will love this movie. Everyone on the planet in "Galactic Gigolo" is a vegetable....watching it was truly a liberating experience. It made me think twice about becoming a vegan. Now, I only eat meat.
Not even a nice try
lor_23 April 2023
My review was written in January 1988 after a screening at Cine 42 on Manhattan's 42nd St.
"Galactic Gigolo" is a home movie masquerading as a feature film. Lensed a year ago as "Club Earth", pic is an interminable attempt at tasteless comedy which proves to be unwatchable.
Carmine Capobianco, whose smug charm is eminently resistible, toplines (and like the rest of cast and crew, fills many different production capacities) as Eoj, a broccoli from Outer Space who wins on a quiz show a two-week vacation to Earth, i.e., Prospect, Connecticut. Pic consists of him using his hypnotic powers to go to bed with every woman in town, while two newshounds (Debi Thibeault and Frank Stewart) record his sexual escapades for the tabloids.
Idiotic subplots feature a mafia gang out to get Eoj and a family backwoods rednecks, who happen to be, yuk, yuk, Jewish. Would-be auteur Gorman Behard's mixture of bad puns, in-jokes, dumb name-dropping and failed slapstick is a chore to endure, especially given the backyard filming absence of production values. Pic's running gag that Elvis Presley (and his subsequent imitators) was a spaceman is about as funny as its rip-roaring potshots at Prospect, Connecticut.
"Galactic Gigolo" is a home movie masquerading as a feature film. Lensed a year ago as "Club Earth", pic is an interminable attempt at tasteless comedy which proves to be unwatchable.
Carmine Capobianco, whose smug charm is eminently resistible, toplines (and like the rest of cast and crew, fills many different production capacities) as Eoj, a broccoli from Outer Space who wins on a quiz show a two-week vacation to Earth, i.e., Prospect, Connecticut. Pic consists of him using his hypnotic powers to go to bed with every woman in town, while two newshounds (Debi Thibeault and Frank Stewart) record his sexual escapades for the tabloids.
Idiotic subplots feature a mafia gang out to get Eoj and a family backwoods rednecks, who happen to be, yuk, yuk, Jewish. Would-be auteur Gorman Behard's mixture of bad puns, in-jokes, dumb name-dropping and failed slapstick is a chore to endure, especially given the backyard filming absence of production values. Pic's running gag that Elvis Presley (and his subsequent imitators) was a spaceman is about as funny as its rip-roaring potshots at Prospect, Connecticut.
Almost, but not quite, a decent follow-up to Psychos in Love
insane_larry28 May 2002
Ok, maybe I'm sick and twisted, but I love Psychos in Love. It looks like it was shot for $153 over a series of long weekends with a bunch of friends kicking in just to say they did it, but it's funny and doesn't pretend to be anything more than what it is. It works in its own way... a silly premise, decent script, ample references, a few good jokes, and a fun cast make it worth it.
When most everyone got together to do Galactic Gigolo... well, they just didn't click as well. It's almost as though they tried to be too ambitious and try to be funny this go around. They tried to be more. It just doesn't work as well.
There are still some good bits in this movie... it's more just watching the individuals and things in the background that makes this humor work when it does. But it isn't quite the same as a whole.
If you can find this, give it a shot... and then try to find Psychos in Love.
When most everyone got together to do Galactic Gigolo... well, they just didn't click as well. It's almost as though they tried to be too ambitious and try to be funny this go around. They tried to be more. It just doesn't work as well.
There are still some good bits in this movie... it's more just watching the individuals and things in the background that makes this humor work when it does. But it isn't quite the same as a whole.
If you can find this, give it a shot... and then try to find Psychos in Love.
See also
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